i’m distraught

and outright sad.
(so sadly distraught I’m blogging twice in one day….but not so much so I abandon my beloved parentheses.)
My story:
On May 3, 2012, I quit smoking after 30+ years.
It was every bit as difficult as you’ve read (I’m still trying to lose the 20 pounds. And, by the way, it has to be that difficult ’cause if it wasn’t, I, (and everyone else who has ever done this) would be smoking right now.) I got through the early days and nights by joining QuitNet.com. It was a big/little online town with chat rooms and clubs as well as the usual general threads. It came with smoking cessation counselors and information packed blogs. We all went by nicknames and pledged. and talked. and celebrated anniversaries. (A former member (may he rest in peace) created special designations for each milestone achieved. for example, after one year ‘smober’ you achieved your “Doctorate of Quitology” and on 500 days your Knighthood etc.) Testimonials were left from successful – and unsuccessful quitters – and these were poured over during the worst twitchiest moments. I logged on everyday for a very long time…until the beginning of this fall. At that point, I needed to make the final clean break. I still logged on several times a week – but not often enough to prepare for the changes that were coming.
Quitnet has redone..well..everything. Journals, clubs, chat rooms, testimonials and nicknames are all gone. I was unprepared. I don’t know anyone’s real name. I missed the window of opportunity. So. Because online was my lifeline and sanity for so long, I will take this time, online, to salute and thank those who helped me, whom I feel so very much for .. we never met but:
(((((((harleyjohn)))))))) thank you!!!! You too Karen aka Derey! lesliejean.. you can do it this time!!!!!! Huge hugs to you too! Sir Walt – thank you for knighting me. And thank you too Neel, rabbitbrush, mytime, torres…everyone…thank you!
Finally…
I poured over testimonials. There were people who inspired me like pjlsan and hizzah. Hugs ladies. and will someone please tell me if janey who states she was “fairly ill” with smoking related diseases in 2005 (or words to that effect) ever made it??
Anyway. Goodbye. Thank you. I love you all.
P. S. I’m sure the new QuitNet.com will be effective if you should wish to use it.
P. P. S. Emotions usually get a bit jiggy when you quit. just saying..
nice cry. thank you again and always.

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